Mulligan’s Reach, Dalmatians and Reviewers… (Not Necessarily In That Order )

Hi All

I can’t promise much joy from today’s blog because to be perfectly honest with you I’m right annoyed. Doesn’t sound like you, I hear you scream! I’m being pedantic. Why? Because I’m annoyed. Why? Well I shall tell you.

Firstly, after flying high yesterday over pink candy-floss clouds, smiling at every angel I passed, I was brought swiftly back to earth, landing on my butt, on a very sharp stone. Someone had dashed over to feedaread to buy my book, Mulligan’s Reach, (did I mention it is now in paperback?) and the gits are charging what I consider to be a bit too much for the postage. I am not mean by nature and I have always considered that something is worth whatever someone is prepared to pay for it but … there is no way on this or any other planet that I am going to let my friends and followers go unprepared.

If I wanted to purchase a book I would consider the postage a necessary evil and in truth it is and maybe I am just out of touch with reality. I guess I don’t really buy stuff that needs delivering. I shall leave the decision to you. If you consider I am worth it then go ahead by all means, I shall be delighted and more. However…

I have paid to make Mulligan’s Reach available through Amazon and I understand that they do not charge postage. Obviously I understand your burning desire to belt off and buy my book but if you want to wait a bit it will be coming to an Amazon store near you – as they say.

And don’t go thinking that this is reversed psychology because it isn’t. I am way too stupid to attempt that.

The other thing that tweaked me a bit last night was an email from a writer friend saying that some low-life (I’m sure it wasn’t anyone reading this because I only have lovely people on here) gave him a ridiculous 2* star review.

Actually it wasn’t a review, it was a short sentence of near abuse. I seriously doubt that they had even read his book – a book, which by the way has many 5* reviews. I am pretty sure it upset him. I had much the same, once. And it upset me. It upset me to the point of seriously considering wearing a bag over my head when I went out in case someone should recognise me and link me to the ridiculous review. But nowadays I am older and wiser and these reviews and crappy people can’t touch me. Why? Aha! Why indeed…

Desensitization. Whoop woo!

When I was married to Mr Vet I was a naive sweet young thing – well naive at least. The first time I saw a dog put to sleep, a Dalmatian, I had to peek through a gap in the consulting room door. The sight of a dog actually ending its life before my eyes was horrific. The second dog I saw put to sleep wasn’t nice. The third dog? I held the third dog securely with my left hand and with my right hand placed my thumb on the dogs leg while the lethal injection was administered .

Desensitization.

The first lambing I witnessed took place on the surgery driveway, in the back of a farmer’s trailer. It was pitch black out there except for a fragment of light shining from the surgery window. The lambing itself was being performed by torchlight. I was massively excited, almost bouncing, waiting to see my very first live lambing. After thirty minutes a head rolled down the ramp and landed at my feet, settling in the splinter of light from the surgery window. The head had a tongue sticking out! I stood my ground but my heart turned over. The lamb was already dead and had to have its head cut off in order to get its body out of the ewe. After a good few more ‘lambing’ encounters I found that my heart no longer turned over, in fact it didn’t miss a beat. Why?

Desensitization.

And this is how it is with reviews. You just get used to the crap and the nonsense of others. The first time hurts as it knocks you off your feet and destroys your faith in your own abilities but after that? Nah. Bring it on.

I no longer fear dead dogs, headless lambs and crap, pointless reviews. Half the time I think these dick-heads only write a review because they want to see their sad little names in print. Well go and write a book you pathetic person and then each and every one of us can unnecessarily slag you off and ruin your day!!

I have to go shopping now to buy some icing for Richard’s Valentines cake. And then, this afternoon, when he has gone to work, I shall dig out the heart-shaped tin and make him a lovely little cake. I tell you – I am way too nice. But as my dear mum used to say, ‘You’ll get your rewards in heaven.’ Hmmm. OK …

Take care my lovelies x