The Greatest Conversationalist …The Cat Or The Man?

Hi All

I admit it, I have conversations with my cat.  If you are not a cat lover this is A. unbelievable and B. ridiculous. I am a cat lover and therefore I find it neither unbelievable nor ridiculous.

My first sighting of Chea each morning is either still in her chair in the lounge or sitting on the kitchen table waiting for me to come down. Notice I said in ‘her’ chair. If she is still in ‘her’ chair then I pop the kettle on before going out to the chucks and leave her to wander through to the kitchen in her own good time.

If she is on the kitchen table I say, ‘Hi Che Che.’ She doesn’t answer at this point. It’s almost as if the loving slate has been wiped clean overnight and you have to start grovelling to her all over again to prove your worthiness and continued devotion.

When I come in from pooh picking the chucks Chea is ready for conversation. I say, ‘hi sweetie, are you ready for your breakfast?’

This produces a head-butt.

‘Shall we have chicken or slop? Hmm, what do you think? Chicken or slop? Slop or chicken?’

‘Meow.’

‘Chicken it is then. How much shall we give you?’

‘Meow.’

‘Quite a lot, hey? You must be hungry?’

‘Meow.’

‘There you go, enjoy.’ I place her dish of chicken on her little plastic mat at the side of her water dish and her bowl of crunchies.

‘Purr, purr, purr.’

I then make a cup of tea and switch on my computer. Chea finishes her chuck and then jumps up on the table and stands between me and the laptop with her tail wrapped around my throat.

‘Purr, purr, purr.’

‘Right! Mind out-of-the-way.’

‘Meow.’

‘No, come on move. I can’t even see the keypad let alone type!’

‘Purr, purr, purr.’

Now she is head butting my chin and walking over the keypad. I’m gently pushing her out-of-the-way. She keeps returning. Now I have her bum in my face.

‘You are not going out yet, it’s too early. The birds are still feeding. Go!’

‘Purr, purr, purr.’

‘Get out-of-the-way … and move your tail out of my tea! You are not going out yet!’

‘Purrrrrrrrr.’

‘Right! Where’s your collar. Let’s let you out.’

‘Meow. Meow. Meow.’

‘Put this collar on!’

‘Meow.’

‘Off you go …and behave …and no birds!’

No answer.

So, there you go. Now compare this to the first sighting of Richard.

Richard walks in from work.

‘The pond pump’s stopped.’ I say.

‘Right.’

‘And the beans need picking…the tall ones that I can’t reach.’

‘Right.’

‘And I’m not cooking tonight so you can have whatever you want.’

‘Right.’

‘And your mother rang.’

‘Right.’

‘You need to ring her back.’

‘Right.’

And off he goes to sort out the pond pump.

I know you think that I’m harsh but honestly I do have a lot to contend with. Last night I said to him, ‘I need to use up some eggs, we have so many just now.’

Richard nodded and then said, ‘OK, well, if I pick up some milk tomorrow do you want to make a big rice pudding?’

I gave him my most, ‘are you really being serious’ look.

‘What?’ he said, in all innocence.

Why would I want to make a rice pudding? You don’t use eggs in a rice pudding!’

‘Oh, don’t you,’ he said, looking at me, and burst out laughing. I shook my head and muttered, ‘idiot,’ which made him laugh even louder. He seems to revel in the moments that prove his ignorance.

However, it is moments like these that bond our relationship. Moments when I suspect that he is an idiot and moments when Richard confirms it.

Chea practising telepathy.."find my collar, put it on my neck, and let me out"
Chea practising telepathy..”find my collar, put it on my neck, and let me out”

Take care my lovelies x

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9 thoughts on “The Greatest Conversationalist …The Cat Or The Man?

  1. We used to onerse with our cts all the tme. Often, he would start the conversation, to cease only when i or daughter had fulfilled whatever need they had. Cat owners know this, other people think w are ma. Evelyn

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  2. Considering I’ve written a story about four stray toms, I talk to my cat all of the time. I did it with my previous darling too. He was my inspiration and my wallpaper on my laptop. Every time I see him, I reminisce about him and think of all the joy he gave me. Then I think of John, the man I live with and I know he has own memories of Moggy. It’s something we both cherish and often talk about. Our new kitten is so bonkers and affectionate that he demands. John doesn’t need that, cos we’re not a couple and all Spock demands is food and a cuddle. Humans demand a lot more!

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  3. Oh I love it! The daily morning ritual that cat lovers endure the world over! I think everyone converses with their cat and, to be honest, I’ve had cat haters here who have had little sweet words with Pusia when they think I can’t hear! One self professed cat hater even called her darling when he came face to face with her in the living room and thought I couldn’t hear! The photo of Chea practising telepathy is gorgeous!

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  4. I had no idea talking to the cats could be seen as ridiculous! I hold full conversations with them, I wonder what the neighbours really think of me?? Although I think having chatty verbal cats that answer back should count in my favour…

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  5. Oh, the peeps talk to me all the time and I talk right back at ’em. Sometimes I meow at them and sometimes… I magically talk to them usin’ THEIR voices. Yeah… I’ve got a couple of crazy peeps. CRAZIER THAN A SQUIRREL MAKIN’ NUT PIES!

    Purrs,
    Nissy

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